By Steven Silvers
Principal Hype Optimizer, GBSM
• Tired of negative stereotypes, PRSA will change the term “public relations” to “hype optimization.”
• Bruce Goldberg’s Press Release Theater will become a Broadway musical staring Nathan Lane as a local newspaper editor who falls for a bottled water publicist played by Swoosie Kurtz. Hit songs include “Embargo my heart until Friday” and “Pourin’ pourin’ pourin’ at the Press Club.”
• Having become enamored with microblogging service Twitter, PR people will be first to adopt nanoblogging service Twit.
• Radical environmental groups will march in front of PR agencies in outrage to global warming caused by the Harvard comma.
• Half of all PR graduates will admit they said they “like working with people” just to get a job.