Check out today’s awkward “Dog The Bounty Hunter” lovefest by Bill Scanlon in the Rocky. Our favorite snippets:

“Duane ‘Dog’ Chapman … sports a look that is a cross between pirate and romance novel cover stud. A sparsely buttoned shiny black shirt allows glimpses of his pecs; he has platinum blond shoulder-length hair that never quits. He’s buff, tricked out and can look very menacing when he’s not smiling or laughing.”